


Once Upon a Time in Brooklyn

by betheflame



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Bucky and Darcy as Siblings, Crown Prince Tony, M/M, MHEA Holiday Movie 2019, Tony Stark Has A Heart, history professor bucky
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-07
Updated: 2019-12-02
Packaged: 2021-01-24 21:28:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21344965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/betheflame/pseuds/betheflame
Summary: His Royal Highness Anthony Edward Stark, Crown Prince of Ortelesia, isnotexcited about his meeting at the UN - demonstrating clean energy initiatives that he's pioneered in the safety of his workshop. He figures he deserves a brief respite from all of it and gives his detail the slip - heading to Brooklyn for an afternoon.There, he accidentally steals the coffee of Dr. James Barnes, disaffected history professor at Brooklyn Arcadia University, and his life changes forever.~*~A fill for Prompt 7 of the MHEA Holiday Movie Challenge.
Relationships: Darcy Lewis/Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes/Tony Stark
Comments: 117
Kudos: 432
Collections: Great stories, MHEA Holiday Movie Challenge 2019





	1. The Meet Cute

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks, as always, to [ko](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kocuria/pseuds/kocuria), [Juulna](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Juulna/pseuds/Juulna), and [HogwartstoAlexandria](https://archiveofourown.org/users/HogwartsToAlexandria) for their perpetual cheer-reading and response to my begging to see if something makes sense. 
> 
> Fill's Danni's Tumblr challenge: "That’s my coffee - hand it over and you won’t lose a hand.” 
> 
> Apologies to everyone I told this was going to be a WinterShock, I just could not get Bucky or Darcy to agree to be royalty this time around. I'll try again later, I promise.

* * *

Once upon a time, in a kingdom no one really knows about because they neither export anything important nor have any particularly fantastic tourist spots, there lived a prince who was more known for his inventions and antics than his diplomacy - a fact which gave his father palpitations.

“No,” Crown Prince Anthony Edward Stark, Duke of Andalosia, Herald of Andraste, and Baron Von Winteriron said over the roar of his blow torch. “I hate New York.”

“I do not care, Anthony,” King Howard Stark, Protector of the Realm, replied and reached under the workbench to cut off the butane supply. “I need you to go to this conference. I don’t understand a single thing about the alternatives to the pipeline that you’ve told me about and so I can’t exactly be the one to advocate for it at the U.N.”

“We’re not even a member state,” Tony replied, glaring at his father. “Why would they listen to us?”

“Because if they don’t, we’ll be blocking Germany, Switzerland, and, I think, the Netherlands from a multi-billion euro project that you seem to be the only one who can create an alternate solution to,” Howard sighed.

The pair bickered at the best of times, and loathed each other most of the time. Howard was frustrated that Tony demonstrated limited interest in running the Kingdom, and Tony was frustrated that Howard couldn’t understand that he’d figure that out once Howard was dead - now was the time for getting everything else out of his head. Tony’s mother, the great Queen Maria, had been a mediator before her tragic death three years previous, but the pair were now left to exist at loggerheads.

“I’m sending James and Samuel along with you and that is _final_, Anthony,” Howard ground out. “Your silly projects and robots will be here when you get back. You leave tomorrow and I’ll make sure that Virginia has everything packed for you.”

Tony let out a frustrated howl as soon as his father left his workshop. At least the trip was with Sam and Rhodey, and Pepper would make sure that his experiments kept running while he was gone.

“Sorry, boys,” he addressed DUM-E, U, and Butterfingers - his prototypes-turned-functional-children - “Dad’s gotta head to the filth trap that is Manhattan. You be good for Auntie Pepper while I’m gone and help her finish the model, okay?”

They beeped and booped, and settled themselves back to their tasks while Tony glanced around his shop, taking an inventory of projects to be able to leave Pepper appropriate instructions.

He trudged his way back up to his quarters and was unsurprised when both Jarvis - his personal butler - and Pepper - his personal assistant - were busy packing his bags for the trip he didn’t want to take.

“Your Highness,” Jarvis addressed him. Tony waved it off, as usual, and Pepper rolled her eyes, as usual.

“Your _Highness_,” she emphasized. “I don’t care what your personal preferences are - you really do need to get used to answering to that title. Not only because this project may bring you into more contact with the world outside of our boundaries, but because it is your title.”

“But it’s not going to really matter as long as the old goat is alive,” Tony responded as he threw a favorite hoodie into the case and saw Jarvis’ jaw clench with disdain. “It’s cotton, J, not nuclear waste.”

“You are speaking to the United Nations, Your Highness,” Jarvis replied in his clipped British accent.

“Not the entire time, J. I’m sure I’ll have time for being a human and not just a performing circus monkey.”

“Tony,” Pepper’s voice was soft and pleading. “You know what comes next year.”

He sighed and ran a hand down his face. Of course he knew what was on the horizon - his 30th birthday, the ancestral deadline dictated by generations of his family as to when he would have to declare a bride. It was already causing enough drama with Howard that it wouldn’t be a bride, per se, but rather a groom.

_“Can’t you just… I don’t know, fake it with a girl?” Howard blustered when Tony came out._

_“Jesus, Dad, no, I cannot just fake it,” Tony rolled his eyes. “First of all, I refuse to lie to our citizens and make them think that if they’re queer, we think there’s something wrong with them. If you’re so fucking desperate for the bloodline, I’ll work with a surrogate - Pepper’s already offered - but I’m not marrying a woman just to keep you and the heteronormative patriarchal history of our family happy.”_

“The Royal Council -” Pepper started.

“The Royal Council can fucking do one, Pep,” Tony cut her off. “I have to find someone by next year, fine, but they need to stop sending me dossiers like it’s a job interview.”

“Well, Your Highness,” Jarvis corrected, “it is. Being spouse to the Crown of Ortelesia is not a small responsibility.”

“Which I why I offer to abdicate to Pep at least three times a week,” Tony snarked. “Because it’s also one I _do not want._”

“We’re not having this fight again,” Pepper sighed. “You are not abdicating, I am not going to be Queen, and you have a responsibility that I know you’ll fulfill wonderfully because for all your hemming and hawing, I know you love your people.”

“They’re fine.”

“Tony.”

“Fine, fine, fine, I do, I really do, you’re right, and I want to start on all the improvements I have ready for them, but I need Howard to step down-”

“-which he won’t do until you are married,” Pepper concluded. “I’m just saying, keep it in the back of your mind, you contradictory dreamer.” She was unable to keep the affection out of her voice.

“Fine,” Tony grumbled.

“Thank you,” Pepper said primly. “Now, here’s the agenda I’ve worked out with Rhodey and Sam and their American contact - a man named Nicholas Fury.”

Tony groaned and flopped onto his bed. I haven’t even taken off yet, and I already hate this trip.

* * *

“Buddy,” Steve Rogers called into his roommate’s bedroom. “Your phone is vibrating off the table.”

“It’s just Darce,” Bucky Barnes called back. “I’m intentionally ignoring her.”

“And you think that’s a good idea?”

“Probably not, but I’m fucking pissed,” Bucky responded as he walked into the living room, towel-drying his shoulder length hair.

Steve sighed. “What did she do now?”

Bucky picked up his phone and scrolled quickly, rolling his eyes dramatically. “She gave my number to Barton.”

Steve spit out his coffee. “Clint Barton. The guy who’s been following you around campus for a month. She gave him your number?”

Bucky nodded. “Thought it was hilarious when he showed up to my lecture last night.”

Steve bit back a smile.

“NO,” Bucky rounded on him. “You do not take her side in this!”

“I’m Switzerland,” Steve held up his hands. “Barton seems harmless, and he is a first year grad student - you’ve told me they’re all kind of over eager puppies. Your sister is just trying to help you make friends.”

“No, your _girlfriend_,” Bucky corrected, “is trying to fuck with me because she’s been doing that since we came out of the goddamn womb.”

“Only because you let her,” Steve offered.

“What happened to neutral?” Bucky threw a pillow at Steve, who caught it handily.

“Listen, just go on a date, will ya? She’ll calm down if you do, I promise,” Steve said. “I’ll make her if she doesn’t.”

“What is her boner for my love life?”

Steve shrugged. “You know she’s bored at work, and I like to think I’m keeping her pretty happy -”

“Gross, I do not need to think about my sister’s vagina.”

“You brought it up, you jagwagon,” Steve rolled his eyes. “I think she honestly just wants you to be happy.”

Bucky grumbled and opened his WhatsApp.

_WhatsApp Chat: #SibsStation_

_Darcy: Okay, so I am actually really sorry._

_Darcy: I didn’t know he’d been quasi-stalking you._

_Darcy: I ran into his roommate, Nat, the scary ginger? And she said she’s going to talk Barton down._

_Darcy: I forget you’re a big deal, brother. I’m sorry._

_Darcy: Can you please respond?_

_Bucky: I’m here._

_Darcy: Are you mad?_

_Bucky: Yes._

_Darcy: I’ve apologized._

_Bucky: Astute observation._

_Darcy: Ass._

_Bucky: I know you don’t think my work is anything special, Darce, but I don’t give my number out for a reason._

_Darcy: What can I do?_

_Bucky: He’s harmless, I believe you. I have him in class next week, I think, so I’ll just explain the misunderstanding._

_Darcy: Is this to do with that stupid poll?_

_Bucky: Evidently, it’s not stupid, but yes._

_Darcy: Okay, Dr. McHottieHair._

_Bucky: No._

Bucky was pulled away from texting his twin by an alarm sounding on his phone, reminding him that it was time to leave for his office hours if he wanted to stop for coffee along the way.

Dr. James Buchanan Barnes, Bucky to his friends and family and a few colleagues he tolerated, was the youngest faculty member at Brooklyn Arcadia University. Specializing in WWII military history, he’d made waves when a fiction book he wrote during college about two best friends who went to war and then discovered they were quite in love with each other hit the New York Times bestseller list nearly overnight. He used the proceeds to fund his education - including a PhD from Durham over in England - and ended up landing a junior professor position at Brooklyn Arcadia right after his defense.

What he _wasn’t_ quite prepared for was that his reputation had preceded him and his first year of Intro to Western Civilization classes had been full of students who had answered the poll at freshman orientation of which professor they were most excited to learn from with “Dr. McHottieHair”.

Which his sister and his best friend lost their minds over.

Three years on, things had mostly settled on campus, but Bucky was still dealing with the occasional fan. More frequently, however, the first year MA students who wanted him as an advisor were doing various acts to ingratiate themselves. Barton was just the latest.

“Stevie,” Bucky said. “I’m heading out. I’ve got a committee meeting at 3, but I’ll probably be home after that.”

“Darcy and I have tickets to something over on 48th tonight,” Steve responded. “Apartment is yours - we’ll stay at hers after.”

Darcy Barnes was a director of a non-profit in Hell’s Kitchen that worked to provide meals for people who lived with HIV but were also shut-ins. Bucky was _unspeakably_ proud of her, and a little bit in awe if he was honest, not that he’d ever tell her that.

Bucky saluted and grabbed his briefcase, securing his scarf and hat before venturing out into the chilly December air. He made his way to the subway, which he rode for seven blocks before exiting right next to his favorite coffee shop - Beans Ahoy.

_Hmmm_, he thought as he opened the door. _More chaotic than usual_.

His eyes scanned the crowd and saw Peter Parker - one of his students who was an engineering major who struggled with grammar, but was trying so damn hard that Bucky couldn’t help but love him - was attempting to control the crowd. Pushing his way towards the side of the coffee bar, he got Peter’s attention.

“Hey, Dr. Barnes,” Peter grinned through obvious exhaustion. “There was a protest on campus and when it ended they all came here, but MJ called out sick, so I’m just kinda swamped. I’ll get your latte started, though.”

“Don’t worry about it, Pete,” Bucky assured the frazzled young man. “I’ll wait.”

The problem was that Bucky forgot to define “wait”, and as five minutes stretched to ten, he was getting increasingly concerned about making it to his office on time. Finally, when he was just about to tell Peter to not worry about it, when Peter’s co-worker - a vaguely unwashed blond named Quill - plunked Bucky’s latte onto the bar and called out, “medium hazelnut one pump soy.”

_At last,_ Bucky remarked to himself and pocketed his phone, ready to get his drink and leave.

When suddenly, another hand was on his cup.

“That’s my coffee, pal,” Bucky addressed the owner of the hand. “Hand it over and you won’t lose a hand.”

“Ah, the famous New York hospitality,” a slightly accented voice responded. “How I have missed it.”

Bucky’s eyes traveled from the cup to the voice and saw the most shockingly beautiful man he’d ever seen.

Which was irrelevant, because he could be Chris _fucking_ Hemsworth and still be Bucky’s sworn enemy in this situation - he was standing between himself and the only thing that helped him survive office hours.

“Listen, buddy,” Bucky schooled his face to stay neutral. “I know it’s chaos in here, but I got a student waiting for me to whine about their 500 word essay they have due on Monday and I simply cannot survive the onslaught of mediocrity I am asked to educate if I don’t have that drink. So, like I said, hand me my coffee and you won’t lose a hand.”

* * *

As soon as the man demanded Tony’s latte, he had two thoughts at the exact same time.

_His man-bun is going to be the death of me_ and _He has no idea who I am._

Tony wasn’t sure which one was more of a turn-on.

“Well, I’m not your ‘buddy’,” Tony took a deliberate sip of the latte and swore he heard the hot man growl. “And I have been here for twenty minutes waiting for this, so I’m not giving it up. How about I order you another one and I’ll deliver it to your mediocrity fest myself.”

The grey eyes shifted warily, but were clearly considering Tony’s offer. “I’m over at Arcadia, Pomfrey Building - you know it?”

Tony nodded, figuring that Google must.

“Room 256. My only student signed up is a complete pain in my ass, so please interrupt us.”

He stalked off without another word to Tony, who found himself following the man with his eyes and not being even a little upset he had ditched Sam and Rhodey at the hotel that afternoon and took a random train to Brooklyn.


	2. The Discovery

“Hey, young man.” Tony winced and raked his brain for all the various American idioms he’d learned over the years. Correcting himself, he called louder at the barista who reminded him remarkably of a puppy. “Hey, kid.”

Wide eyes snapped in his direction. “Me?”

Tony nodded. “I need another one of my lattes, for that man who stalked out of here.”

“Oh, Dr. Barnes,” the boy’s - _nametag: Peter_ \- mouth quirked into a small smile. “Yeah, everyone knows he hates office hours.”

“Dr. Barnes?”

Peter nodded and wiped the milk nozzle with a rag. “He’s my History of the Americas professor. I’m in engineering, but we need all these electives and my girlfriend signed us up for his. I mean, he’s cool and I read his book just like everyone else did -”

And with that, Peter was off and running. By the time Tony was handed a replacement latte, he’d learned that not _only_ was James Barnes the owner of a jawline that was ready to reduce Tony to mush, he was actually a pretty impressive man.

A pretty impressive man who had no idea he’d _almost_ stolen the coffee of a Crown Prince.

There was something so incredibly wonderful about that feeling, especially since his phone was absolutely blowing up with texts from his security detail. _I should probably do something about that._

He asked Peter for quick directions to Dr. Barnes’ office and began to make his way down the block. Two taps to his hands-free earpiece and he had Pepper on the line.

“Your Highness, where the _fuck_ are you,” Pepper hissed.

Tony winced. He could count on one hand the number of times Pepper had cursed at him. “I’m in Brooklyn.”

“Brooklyn.”

“Yes, the borough next to-”

“I know where Brooklyn is,” Pepper snapped. “I am just _confused_, as the schedule the palace provided us with has you in _Manhattan_ and at the Ritz Carlton down in the Financial District.”

“Yeah, I went rogue.”

“You went rogue,” Pepper drawled slowly.

“Yeah, you know, wanted to take in the sights and sounds -”

“You are the crown prince, you absolute _muppet_, you do not get to go rogue,” she hissed. “I’m telling Rhodey right now-”

“24 hours,” Tony blurted, interrupting her. “Give me 24 hours. Work your magic with the palace, please, but I met -” he cut himself off, knowing that he’d already said too much.

“Anthony,” Pepper said quietly. “Did you already -”

“No,” he cut her off again. “We ordered the same coffee and maybe I stole his, I’m not sure, and he has no idea who I am and I’m going to deliver him a replacement and I’m going to try to have a conversation with a human being who didn’t fucking _bow_ when he saw my face.”

“You stole his coffee?”

“Yeah, we have the same order and the shop was crowded. He told me to give him back his coffee and I wouldn’t lose my hand. Pep! Do you know how long it’s been since someone threatened me with corporal punishment? At least ten years, since the council made Howard stop threatening since it hurt staff morale. Anyway, it felt so normal, so… 24 hours, Pep. Please.”

There was a brief silence on the other end of the phone and Tony knew he had won.

“Twenty. Four. Hours,” she enunciated each word with a force that Tony could feel from the other side of the Atlantic. “I’m activating the secret tracker you put in your phone, though, so I can see where you are. If you leave either Brooklyn or Manhattan without texting me first, so help me God, Anthony, I will quit and you’ll be on your own.”

“Understood,” he grinned. “Thanks, Pep. You’re the best.”

By the time the pair hung up, Tony had arrived at the entrance to Bucky’s building. Following signs and remembering what the kid had said - stone stairs on your left, first flight then through the 2nd door on the right, straight for two intersections and then he’s on the right - he was relieved to see the door marked “Dr. James Barnes” was slightly ajar.

“But Dr. Barnes, I’m sure I could improve with direct help from -”

“Shania, I appreciate that, I do. But like I’ve told you about fifteen times already, the writing center is going to be the best place for you.”

Tony stifled a giggle. Not that he blamed the girl for very obviously hitting on the Hot Professor, but _boundaries_.

“I know, Dr. Barnes -”

Well, she practically purred his name and that felt like Tony’s signal.

“Knock knock,” he intoned. “Coffee delivery for Dr. Barnes?” He pushed the door open with his hip and was greeted with the sight of a young woman leaning across James’ desk and James leaning as far back in his chair as the laws of physics allowed.

“Ah, thank you, Andrew,” James exclaimed as he was clearly both grateful for Tony’s interrupting and scrambling to make it seem like they knew each other. “Shania, I’m sorry, this is my colleague over from Europe and I need to be with him. Your paper is fine, and if you have any further concerns about grammar, the writing center will be happy to assist and if you’re worried about content, I know there are some study groups. The final paper is worth 25% of your grade, so it’s important to get right, but I can’t help you more than I already have in class, Shania.”

Seemingly knowing when she’d been defeated, the young woman gathered her things and walked past Tony with a flirty glare in her eyes. “Europe, eh?”

“Wrong tree, love,” Tony said, not unkindly. “Since at least my late teens.”

Tony heard a bark of laughter come from James’ side of the room and the girl looked confused, but huffed off. Tony let himself further into the office and handed James his coffee. “It’s Anthony, by the way, but Andrew wasn’t a bad cover.”

“James.” The grin was quick and nearly cut Tony off at the knees. “Thanks for the save, Anthony. She’s been a problem for most of the semester.”

“I don’t know your laws,” Tony replied, “but that seems like harassment. And, please, Tony is fine.”

James nodded and gestured for Tony to take a seat. “I think so, too, and I’ve reported it a few times, but my dean isn’t really quick to give a shit, so I just leave the door open and hope for the best. She’s also, for the record, barking up the wrong tree and I’ve even told her that.”

“Oh, fuck, she likes a challenge?” Tony started laughing.

James nodded. “But enough about my nightmare student, is that lilt French? I threw out Europe as a generic, but am I close?”

Tony nodded. “French is my first language, yes, but I speak more. I’m from Ortelesia and we’ve been a trading country for many, many centuries. Most of us are taught how to speak all the neighboring languages.”

“Ortelesia,” James muttered. “I’m such a dumb American, but is that near Switzerland? All I can remember right now is from research I did on a book once, and you were a part of France?”

Something fizzed up Tony’s spine at the confusion in James’ voice. _He does not know us, he doesn’t know my family. It wasn’t just that he didn’t expect to see the Crown Prince of Ortelesia in a coffee shop in Brooklyn, it was that he probably didn’t know there _was_ a Crown Prince of Ortelesia._

This was possibly the greatest day of Tony’s life.

“We were part of several principalities between 1650 and 1873, when we declared our independence from France, yes,” Tony supplied. “We are small and I never expect anyone to know us, so…” he trailed off with a gallic shrug. “Did the small barista boy make the coffee right?”

James laughed. “He did. Peter’s got an attention to detail that amazes me.”

“He said he was in engineering?”

James nodded and took a sip. “He wasn’t too excited about my class, but his girlfriend, MJ, is one of my major discipline students - she’s stuck with me for a good bit of her history classes because of what she’s concentrating on - and she dragged him to the History of the Americas. I could tell from the first class that I was fucking with his idea of America and that he wasn’t quite sure what to do.”

“What does that mean,” Tony asked and quirked an eyebrow. “His idea of America.”

“Oh, God, how much time do you have,” James laughed. “Once I get going here, I have trouble stopping.”

Tony made eye contact with James while he slowly took off his watch and put it in his pocket. “I have a meeting tomorrow in Manhattan, but until then, I have no plans. I took a subway train and got off randomly and found myself in a fight with you over coffee. Beyond that?”

* * *

_That shrug_, Bucky thought. _Do they teach that as a seduction technique?_

“Beyond that, I would love to hear about America from an expert,” Handsome Tony finished. “However, I’m out of coffee.”

James grinned and made a split-second decision to do something he never did. Scribbling a note on a piece of paper, he grabbed his scarf and jacket and started winding himself up in warmth. “Well, deconstructing the myth of American exceptionalism is best done over hot beverages. There’s a Christmas market in the park around the corner - I’m sure you have better ones in Ortelesia-”

“Yes, let’s go,” Tony interrupted. “Our markets have an absence of sexy men, so today’s adventure will be better.”

James fought a grin - _so he feels this too_ \- and slapped a sign on his office door as he guided Tony out into the hallway.

_Dr. Barnes has cancelled office hours today. Had to go see a man about coffee._

* * *

Their first kiss was about forty-five minutes later, when Tony had whipped cream in his mustache and Bucky decided it was easier to kiss it off than tell him. That was around the time “James” had evolved into “Bucky” and he’d learned that Tony was an engineer by both trade and passion.

Their second, third, and fourth were later as they ducked into a pub to get away from the cold. They found a back corner booth and Tony ordered a round of whiskey and their hands wandered underneath the table. Tony heard about Bucky’s book and Dr. McHottieHair and the pressures of tenure and teaching.

“I never do this,” Bucky finally said, retying his hair tie from where Tony’s fingers had undone his bun. “I never, and I repeat, never do this. But, my roommate isn’t home and-”

“Yes.”

* * *

The night was _incredible_. Tony knew they were on borrowed time and so he made the most of it. He hadn’t been with anyone who hadn’t been vetted before and the freedom was intoxicating. They laughed, and explored, and did all the awkward stuff of sex with a new person. _Oh, I like that - no, please not - oh, yes, that’s - can you?_ Tony learned that Bucky had a fetish for people playing with his hair, and Bucky learned that Tony’s back muscles were one of his new kinks.

“_Fuckssake, Tony,” Bucky huffed out as he collapsed on the bed next to Tony after round three. “I need to talk to your trainer.”_

_“Why?” Tony mumbled, face half-smushed into the bed._

_“Because I need to thank them for your back,” Bucky leaned in to kiss Tony once more and traced his left hand along Tony’s shoulder._

_Tony chuckled slowly. “That’s just from hauling engines and other projects. The only working out I do is running and that’s literally only when Pepper threatens me at knife point.”_

_“Oh, well, then I hope I get to thank the engines some day.”_

Tony loved Bucky’s firm softness - the contrast of a body that was cuddly but strong.

_“My buddy Stevie, he’s like a greek statue come to life. Our friend Carol’s basically the same way. My body has just never, just never quite… I can’t seem to not be pudgy.”_

_“Pudgy,” Tony rolled the word around on his tongue. “I don’t know this word, pudgy.”_

_Bucky poked at his belly. “That, that’s pudge.”_

_“You mean the parts of you that are strong and soft at the same time,” Tony whispered. “You mean the parts of you that make me feel safe?”_

_Bucky’s eyes shone with something Tony couldn’t quite place, but still recognized, as he continued, “Because I have a thing for people who make me feel safe. And this pudge you claim to not like makes me feel like I could stay wrapped around you forever.”_

_“Works for me,” Bucky breathed. He hitched Tony’s leg up around his hips and kissed him slowly._

Tony hadn’t been lying or playing games when he told Bucky he’d felt safe. There was something about the man that just _calmed_ Tony. The mystery of being known and yet not was certainly part of it, but there was something else. Something that would have scared him if he and Bucky had a future. Which they obviously didn’t, because why would Bucky give up a good life to move to a country he’d only vaguely heard of and try to help run it? It sucked, but Tony knew the facts. The not-being-known part was going to have to end, therefore. He hated it, but he knew it.

The apartment was still dark, but Tony’s phone told him it was about 7am when he heard the front door opening and smelled coffee being brewed.

“Steve and Darcy,” Bucky muttered, kissing the back of Tony’s neck. “I’ll go.”

Bucky hoisted himself out of bed - Tony felt the absence of his warm body immediately - and grabbed a hoodie on his way out of the room. Tony debated the need for warmth over the need for coffee. The latter won out and he grumbled his way out the door of Bucky’s room, grabbing a throw blanket to wrap around his person in lieu of a bathrobe. He grabbed his phone at the last minute, realizing it was probably time to turn off Do Not Disturb and check in with Pep.

“- he’s gonna want coffee,” Tony heard Bucky explaining to who he assumed was Darcy.

“He’s -” Darcy caught Tony’s eyes over Bucky’s shoulder and Tony _knew_. The jig was up. “He’s the Hot Prince. The Hot Prince is in your living room. You were in the Hot Prince. The Hot Prince -”

“Jesus _fuck_, can you stop saying that?” Bucky snarled at his sister. “Who the fuck is the Hot Prince.”

“Crown Prince Anthony Stark of Ortelesia,” Darcy explained to her brother, talking as though Tony wasn’t even in the room. Which, honestly, was helpful because Tony couldn’t have found words in that moment if Howard told him the crown depended on it. “Buzzfeed ran a thing last year on the world’s most eligible bachelors and he was named the Hot Prince because, well, obviously. Didn’t know he was gay, though.”

“We tried to keep that a bit under wraps,” Tony found his voice briefly. “Bucky, I-” he was cut off by the sound of Pepper’s ringtone sounding through the apartment. Throwing an apologetic look at Darcy, Bucky, and the blond he hoped was Steve, Tony answered the call.

“Pep, this is not a great time,” Tony growled into the phone.

“Well, it’s about to become an even lesser great time. The King discovered you were not with Rhodey and -”

“Fuck, they’re on their way here?”

“He’s their boss,” Pepper’s voice was apologetic. “Would this be a bad time to remind you that if you accepted the crown, you’d be their boss?”

Tony cast a glance across the room to a horrified looking Bucky and something in him just crumbled. “Yeah, Pep, a bad time. I’ll get out of here so that they don’t freak out the professor.”

“I’d move quickly - they’ve found-”

Pep was interrupted by a forcible knock on the door.

_“By order of the Royal Court of Ortelesia, you have exactly ten seconds to open this door or it will be opened for you,”_ Rhodey’s clear voice rang into the apartment and Tony blanched.

“At ease, Sugarbear,” Tony replied and he simultaneously rolled his eyes and crossed the room to open the door. “I’m not bound and gagged - not even in the fun way. I’m fine.”

“Like I trust you to make that determination,” Rhodey responded as he, Sam, and about six other guards flanked the apartment door.

“Good lord,” Darcy whispered. “I was right.”

Tony smiled over his shoulder. “Indeed, Ms. Barnes, you were.”

“Your Highness,” Sam began and Tony waved him off.

“I’m sure Howard is about to blow a gasket, and I don’t want to get you guys court martialed. Give me five minutes - you can set a timer - and I’ll meet you in the car?”

“We are under orders to not let you out of our sight,” Sam replied evenly. Tony knew the man was sympathetic to Tony’s need to be a human versus a prince, but his loyalty to the crown was also sacrosanct.

“Of course you are,” Tony sighed. He turned to Bucky, who was on the couch and still looking shell-shocked.

“Do I bow?” Bucky croaked out.

Rhodey and Sam both said ‘yes’ at the same time that Tony said, “you and I are a bit past that, I’d say.”

Bucky nodded and cast eyes to the men in the doorway once again. “So, I guess-”

“What are you doing later?” Tony blurted. “I have a reception tonight and it’s going to be terribly boring and will, in all likelihood, serve bland chicken, but I’ll be there so there will at least be sarcasm.”

“Your Highness,” Sam started and Tony whirled on him.

“Do not even try to tell me you didn’t run him and Stevie here and maybe even Darcy through every single one of our databases the minute you tracked me. So if you haven’t forcibly removed me by now then you know he’s not working with those separatist jagoffs who are trying to kill me. He’s a hot guy I met yesterday who happens to be a fucking genius and I want to spend more time with him and so help me God and my ancestors, you cannot stop me.”

“People are trying to kill you?” Darcy whispered. “But you’re the Hot Prince? Who wants to kill you?”

“Many, many people.” Tony smiled ruefully at her. “Thank you for your vote of confidence, however. Now, Bucky, tonight. Dinner with about five hundred complete strangers? You in?”

* * *

Bucky generally prided himself on thinking quickly. He was pretty good in a crisis, and could think on his feet when his students asked him questions he hadn’t prepared for. Growing up as Darcy’s other half meant that he was well acquainted with talking his way out of scrapes and coming up with plans on the spot.

Nothing in his life had prepared him for the last twenty minutes, however, and he was having trouble processing.

Tony - the energetic, magnetic, handsome as fuck guy he slept with last night - was _royalty_. Tony - the guy he could see himself falling for if he was one of those idiots who believed in happily ever afters - was a _fucking prince_.

Most relevant to this exact moment, however, was that he was a prince who just asked Bucky out on a date.

Looking directly at Tony, Bucky tried to forget the last few moments and focused on the sexy, vibrant, brilliant man who snuggled like an octopus and sucked like a Hoover. That man, Bucky would give a thousand dates to. So it was to _that_ man that Bucky said, “yes”.


	3. Things Get Serious

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Tony and Bucky freak out over how fast they're falling for each other, but their families calm them down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My darling Juulna gave her expert beta skills to this once again and I (and our boys) are grateful.

_WhatsApp Chat: BarnesRogersTrio_

_Darcy: I still say the chat name sounds like a terrible Peter, Paul, and Mary knockoff from the 70s or something._

_Steve: When you come up with a better one, you can change it._

_Steve: Buck, how is it going?_

_Bucky: It’s… really weird._

_Darcy: Weird good? Weird weird?_

_Bucky: He has introduced me all night as the esteemed Dr. James Barnes from Brooklyn Arcadia and when someone says they haven’t heard of me, he recites passages from my last few journal articles._

_Steve: I thought he didn’t know who you were yesterday._

_Bucky: He told me the meeting this afternoon was boring so he had some time to read._

_Darcy: He had time to read your ramblings about the economic parallels between the whatever and the whoziwhatists you’re on about these days?_

_Bucky: Honestly, your support of my career just overwhelms me. Truly. Overwhelmed._

_Steve: Darce._

_Darcy: I liked the points you made about economic parallels between different peace agreements - especially apartheid and the Troubles - but I think you need to explain Colombia better._

_Darcy: Better?_

_Bucky: Sorry, I just died from shock. I am texting beyond the grave._

_Darcy: Fucker._

_Steve: So Prince Tony read your work?_

_Bucky: At least the last four published articles._

_Steve: And how does that make you feel?_

_Bucky: Well, Dr. Rogers, thank you for playing therapist right now. It makes me feel fucking weird. Why would a prince give a shit about my academic work on conflict economies?_

_Darcy: Why would a prince ask you to a party? Because you’re witty and kind when you’re not being a dick and smart and my friends tell me you’re hot._

_Steve: So do mine._

_Darcy: are we doing another round of “Jamie has crippling self-esteem issues” or are you asking honestly?_

_Darcy: Buck, it’s been 10 minutes. Are you okay?_

_Darcy: Was that too bitchy?_

_Bucky: Sorry, he asked me to dance._

_Steve: Be careful, pal, that your carriage doesn’t turn back into a pumpkin._

_Bucky: If he was a normal, I’d ask him out again._

_Darcy: Do it anyway._

_Darcy: Seriously._

_Bucky: He’s a fucking prince._

_Darcy: He already fucked you and wanted to spend more time with you. Clearly he’s into you._

_Bucky: he’s a prince._

_Darcy: And you’re James Buchanan Fucking Barnes, one of the best men on the goddamn planet. Are you going to make me get all sister feels in here, because I will. So he’s a prince, cool, that’s just what he was born into. You’re the best because of who you are and who you choose to be and just by being you._

_Darcy: Head out of your ass, brother, he’s into you. Ask him out._

_Bucky: too late._

_Bucky: Did we have plans for New Years yet?_

_Steve: No. Why?_

_Bucky: Because I’m going to Ortelesia._

* * *

The FaceTime tone sounded on Bucky’s phone and he practically dove across the bed to grab his phone. The six-hour time difference between Brooklyn and Ortelesia was a bitch.

“Hi sugarplum,” Tony’s face registered as soon as Bucky hit accept.

“Hi, sweetness,” Bucky replied fondly.

It had been three weeks since their fated coffee incident and the two men had spoken every day since.

_“How is this going to work?” Bucky blurted at the end of the party that second night. “I mean, the distance, and the whole ruling a country thing?”_

_Tony shrugged. “I don’t know.”_

_“You, genius with the eidetic memory who designed an entirely new drainage system for your entire country off the top of your head doesn’t know?”_

_“Well, I could spin that on you pretty quickly too, Buckaroo,” Tony smirked. “You, genius with the ability to analyze complex economic structures and historical contexts off the top of your head, you don’t know how dating works?”_

_Bucky playfully shoved Tony in the back of the limo as they were being driven back to Tony’s hotel. “Be serious, Your Highness.”_

_“No,” Tony quickly said. “Never. I do know that. If this is going to be something at all, you have to call me Tony at all times. Anthony if so inclined, but I am not your sovereign.”_

_“But it’s an honorific globally,” Bucky protested. “I mean, I’m sure I’m not meeting Meghan anytime soon, but I’d still call her by her title.”_

_“You can if you want,” Tony said absently. “I haven’t seen them in a while, could be fun.”_

_Bucky blinked a few times. “Parking that because of course you’re friends with them, but seriously.”_

_“James,” Tony wove his fingers through Bucky’s and leaned his head close. “Until we were so rudely interrupted this morning, I was having the best date I’ve literally ever had. I have no idea why this feels so right or why I’m so sure we can make it work, but it does and I am. The last time someone asked me questions about me and not my crown was, I believe, about twenty-five years ago and I’m not willing to give that or you up so quickly._

_“So, is this gonna be slightly awkward? I’d imagine so. I hope the conversations you had with Pepper this afternoon about the media were helpful and your university has already been contacted. But you are worth the puzzle to me, sweetheart. Am I worth it to you?”_

The Ortelesian Royal Family did not comment on Tony’s private life, nor did it allow anyone in Tony’s private life to comment on Tony. That first day - between Tony being whipped away by his guards and when a driver collected Bucky later that evening for the event - had been spent signing NDAs and giving over contact information so that his friends and family could be informed of their new personal policies of silence. Pepper explained to Bucky the processes that went along with being in a relationship of any kind with Tony and also explained that should he and Tony choose to pursue an official romantic relationship, he would need to become comfortable with a full time bodyguard detail.

After breathing into a paper bag, and signing a lot of papers, Bucky had spent the past three weeks falling in love with Tony Stark.

He still wasn’t sure what to do with Crown Prince Anthony Edward Stark, Duke of Andalosia, Herald of Andraste, and Baron Von Winteriron. But Tony? Tony, he was _crazy_ about.

“Are you done all of your grading?” Tony asked.

Bucky nodded. “Final grades were due to the provost at 5pm, so I’m officially on winter break.”

Tony grinned. “And you come here in six days!”

The pair were like teenagers bubbling with excitement and neither was particularly ashamed of it.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come and pick you up?” Tony continued.

Bucky rolled his eyes. “Tony, it’s a seven hour flight. That’s a long time for you to be cooped up on a plane just to see me quicker. We can be adults about this.”

Tony pouted but changed the subject.

Bucky wasn’t really surprised, however, when Tony was standing on the tarmac six days later when he went to meet the royal jet.

Nor was he upset in the slightest. Mile High Club really took on a whole new meaning on 1000 thread count sheets.

* * *

“Your Highness,” Pepper whispered. “I think you should breathe.”

“Overrated,” Tony rasped, fingering his great-grandfather’s pocket watch. It was the only family heirloom he kept in his personal office, really, and that was because it was small enough to fit in the desk. It had become his talisman when Howard had given it to him for his 18th, and he found himself clutching it tighter and tighter over the past few days.

“He likes you,” Pepper said gently. “You have got to calm down.”

“That’s rich coming from you, Pep,” Tony laughed sardonically. “You, who want me to focus on how I have to get married soon and how I have to select the person to be the Prince Consort and how I need to do my duty - you’re telling me to calm down when the man I cannot get out of my head is taking a nap in my room?”

She let out a soft chuckle and he turned to look at her. “First of all,” Pepper smiled, “I have never, in the how many years we have known each other, seen you like this. James is not just some random American - you like him and I think that’s charming.”

“Charming is not something you build a Kingdom around.”

“It worked for Danielle and Henry in France all those years ago,” Pepper raised an eyebrow.

“We have talked about French history, Virginia, and how that movie is a gross exaggeration,” Tony sighed, but smiled, and he knew that’s what Pepper had been going for.

“You’ve been talking to him every day for over a month. For hours sometimes,” she added. “I cannot think of another person who has so entirely captured you this way and I think you should pay attention to that.”

Tony scoffed. “By asking him to marry me after knowing him for less time than Parliament is in session each year?”

“No,” Pepper replied. “By spending the next ten days asking intentional questions about what it would look like to maybe ask him to marry you sometime next year. Court him, Anthony, just like every single one of your weird ancestors has had to do.”

“Those weird ancestors are your sovereigns,” Tony raised an eyebrow.

“Doesn’t make them any less weird,” Pepper grinned. “Now, will James be joining you for all the New Year activities, or just the formal ball?

Tony flipped through a pile of papers on his desk that outlined his official schedule for the week. “He said he’ll go to everything, but he has no idea how overwhelming that’s about to get, so we’ll see.”

“So we’ll see,” Pepper repeated, catching Tony’s eye and he knew what else she was saying.

_What if all of my dreams were about to come true? What if I did get to live the fairy tale we tell children about our lives? What if Bucky could really love me and choose this life?_

* * *

Bucky fiddled with his cufflinks for the fourth time in as many minutes and Tony reached over and clasped his hand.

“Bucky, you’re going to be fine.”

“I’m meeting your father,” Bucky hissed, “and I have to do it in front of the entire country and this cummerbund means I cannot breathe and nothing about this is fine.”

Tony bit back a grin. “What is the American word; hangry? Are you hangry, honey?”

“No, _honey_, I’m not hangry, I’m fucking petrified,” Bucky huffed out a breath. “I just… your father. This is a lot.”

“Because he’s King - ”

Bucky cut him off with a kiss. “I honestly could give less than zero fucks about crowns right now, I’m just really fucking nervous because I haven’t made it to the parent-meeting stage in a long ass time and I’m nervous I’m gonna fuck it all up because I’m an oafy American and-”

It was Tony’s turn to cut Bucky off with a kiss at that point. “I love you.”

Bucky blinked at Tony. “Now? Now is when you tell me this?”

Tony giggled. “Yes, now. Because I want you to understand that the pomp and circumstance that’s about to happen - where the Crown Prince has to present his boyfriend to the King is nonsense compared to how I feel about you. Utter nonsense.”

Bucky melted under the adoration in Tony’s eyes and leaned forward to kiss Tony once more. “Boyfriend is still a lot to get used to.”

“Well, just let me know when you’re there, because I have a few others labels I’d like to talk through,” Tony said simply, belying the meaning behind his words.

“Oh really?”

Tony nodded and squeezed Bucky’s hand. “Now let’s go meet His Royal Asshatness quickly so that we can get on with our night.”

“We don’t have anything planned after this ceremony and dinner,” Bucky remarked.

“Well, nothing on the official schedule, but I’ve been known to improvise.”


	4. Bucky Forgets to Use His Words

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Bucky panics, Tony's oblivious to it, and one of them makes a dramatic escape.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, Juulna has the eagle eye corrections for my errant comma usage and general shenanigans with the English language. Thanks, babe.
> 
> CW: Body Image Issues
> 
> You may have noticed our Buckaroo calling himself 'pudgy' a few chapters back. We explore a little bit more of that here, so be aware.

_WhatsApp Chat: #SibStation_

_Darcy: Buck, that voice memo was just a lot of gibberish, can you translate?_

_Bucky: I can’t do this._

_Darcy: Can’t do what?_

_Bucky: This._

_Darcy: Can you talk right now because I’m calling._

Bucky wiped his hands on the blanket tucked around him and waited for the FaceTime chime to sound.

“Hi,” he smiled at his sister.

“What’s the matter, Bucky Bear?”

Darcy’s the one who had given him that nickname, back when they were children. His for her had been “Hook” because whenever they played pirates, she insisted on being Captain Hook and making him walk the plank about seventeen times. He was the only one who ever used ‘Hook’ still, but everyone had started using ‘Bucky’ pretty quickly once she explained it was because he loved the rodeo.

He hated the rodeo.

But they had an uncle who was a rodeo circuit rider and they went to see him each year at the big stockshow and that’s where it all came from - Uncle Slade had called him ‘buckaroo’ one time and Darcy had latched onto it and that was the end of anyone ever calling him ‘James’.

His sister was a little shit.

But God how he loved her.

“He’s perfect.”

“Oh, I’m sure he’s not,” she smiled.

“I don’t need bitchy sarcasm right now, Darcy,” Bucky snapped, and then took a breath. “I’m sorry.”

“Fuck, you are really… are you eating and breathing?”

Bucky nodded. “I’m eating, I promise, some of the richer foods are doing a number on my stomach, but Tony noticed and the palace kitchen has started making some blander foods and did you just hear the words coming out of my mouth, holy shit.”

“Okay, let’s back up,” Darcy responded. “What, exactly, are you freaking out about? That’s he’s royalty? That you’re falling quickly? That you don’t speak French? What?”

“Yes,” Bucky smiled wanly. “Yes.”

“Which one do you want to tackle first?”

Bucky played with a thread on the blanket. It was 2am for him and, thus, about 8pm for Darcy. He and Tony had spent the previous evening at a court function where he was introduced to about a hundred foreign dignitaries and had even gotten to talk about his work throughout dinner. Tony was an effortless host - setting Bucky up to shine in conversation - and Bucky fell for him a little more each day.

Problem was that Bucky fell a little bit out of love with the idea of dating a prince each day as well.

“The prince bit,” Bucky said.

“He can’t abdicate,” Darcy replied, and Bucky heard noise on her end. “Steve’s just walked in - do you want him to be a part of this or no?”

Bucky paused and shook his head. Darcy nodded and he heard her tell Steve it was a twin thing and Steve’s face appeared briefly.

“Fucking twin thing,” Steve said, but there was a twinkle in his eye that told Bucky he understood completely. “Your move on Words with Friends.”

Bucky nodded and Steve disappeared. Darcy waited for a few seconds before continuing. “He’ll be painting for at least an hour now, so we’re safe.”

“What do you mean he can’t abdicate?”

“I looked it up,” Darcy said. “The laws of Ortelesia say that a sovereign is only able to smoothly abdicate to an heir, or something happens where the High Court basically rules until a worthy relative is found? I wasn’t quite sure; it’s something to do with a scandal back in the 1700s and seems messy. But Tony has no heir, so that’s a thing.”

Bucky’s head spun a bit. “Even if he could, though, I could never ask him to do that. I’ve been here for six days and I know that he loves this place and that this place loves him.”

“So are you more worried about staying with him since he won’t?”

“I’m, basically, an economics nerd from Red Hook, Darce. Sure, I’ve won some awards and the whole book thing is pretty cool, but what the hell have I done that qualifies me to marry a goddamn prince who actually runs his country? They have a President-y type person, and I don’t fully understand the dynamics, but I know the Starks have more power than the British royal family, so I’d have to know things and then there’s all the official appearances and _I just can’t._” Bucky’s voice had reduced to a panicked hiss.

“Or you could be a stay-at-home dad, and write books, and have hot sex at night with a man who clearly thinks you hung the moon,” Darcy corrected gently. “Because from everything you’ve told me over the past month, that’s closer to the offer on the table.”

“Nothing’s on the table!” Bucky cried. “That’s part of the problem!”

“Wait, so this freakout is entirely just on… what?”

“What do you mean?”

Darcy raised an eyebrow. “Have you had a conversation with him?”

Bucky blanched. “I don’t want to ruin anything.”

Darcy pinched the bridge of her nose. “Let me get this straight. You are falling in love with a man whose job is complicated and has serious implications for whether or not you can be together and instead of _addressing_ this with him, you’re leaving me panicked WhatsApp garbles?”

When Bucky didn’t respond, she groaned.

“You are not wise, James Buchanan Barnes, and I do not know why I put up with you. Talk to him. Use some of those big fancy words you learned to become a doctor and ask him what he’s thinking.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Bucky waved her off. “You’re right.”

She faked shock at being told that, and then he asked after her day, and forty-five minutes later, he ended the call more determined that ever to not talk to Tony.

The last six days had honestly been the most perfect of his life - which meant that they were too good to be true and that the bubble would burst soon. Why ruin it early when he can just quietly say goodbye to Tony later, and let them drift apart when he goes back to Brooklyn. Who can really make long distance romances work, anyway?

Satisfied with his decision, he put on a podcast and attempted to drift off to sleep.

* * *

“What’s your favorite part of all of this?” Bucky asked Tony the next day, quietly running his fingers up and down Tony’s arm.

“Of the prince stuff?” Tony clarified and Bucky nodded.

The pair were in Bucky’s room in the palace, rumpled from a morning spent in bed and lazily eating brunch. Tony had been in his workshop the night before while Bucky had been on the phone with Darcy and had sought Bucky out when the prototype was finished around 6am. Luckily for them, Bucky slept like the dead and found waking up with a warm octopus wrapped around him to be deeply wonderful.

“Yeah, like all this stuff we’ve been doing, is it normal?”

Tony shrugged and took a bite of toast. “Kind of? I usually blow off more events that are scheduled for me, especially if I’m working on something that’s particularly bothering me. But my mother’s favorite holiday was Christmas and a lot of these things are what she set up or what she loved.”

“How old were you when she died?”

“It was three years ago,” Tony supplied. “So there are days it feels as fresh as yesterday and others where I can breathe.”

Bucky threaded his fingers through Tony’s. “Darcy and I feel the same way about our dad. Mom was gone before we turned three and he raised us all on his own. Steve’s ma was around to help, and so were a few other neighborhood folks - poor Darcy had fifteen mothers - but it was the three of us. When he died…”

“When?”

“Four days after the first printing of my book finished the press run, actually.” Bucky wiped a tear with his free hand. Keep it together, Barnes. “I don’t remember the book tour at all. There are pictures that my students show me or memes my colleagues share and I’m so grateful the publisher got me a stylist because I couldn’t get myself out of bed most mornings, much less actually look like a professional human.”

“Are they the ones who gave you the manbun?”

Bucky laughed at Tony’s tone. “No, actually, although I know that’s your favorite feature.”

“Technically, your eyes and your jawline are in competition for that prize, and the ass ain’t too bad either. Oh! And your arms, and the smile,” Tony leaned over to kiss Bucky quickly. “But your brain is the true victor.”

Bucky laughed. “Now you’re just being adorable.”

Tony shook his head. “That first day, when we were walking through the park, you explained complex economic theories in the same way most people discuss which of those dreaded sisters with the TV show,” Tony snapped his fingers like he was trying to jog his memory. “Kudishans? Doesn’t matter, the ones that people fight over who is better. And the questions you asked about my work were so… perfect, so inquisitive - no one has ever paid that close attention before. Pepper is my best friend and she’s sat through hundreds of hours of me explaining circuit analyses to her, but she doesn’t understand them. Within ten minutes you did and the only reason I didn’t propose right then was that we were in public.”

As Tony had been talking, a blush spread across Bucky’s face and he started pushing his loose hair behind his ear in nervousness. “I guess.”

Tony sat up a little and spun himself in the bed so that he was facing Bucky. “Is this about the McHottieHair bullshit?”

Bucky must not have answered fast enough for Tony’s tastes because the other man continued. “You know, when you told me about that, and about how you hated it, I was really confused. Pepper was a really big fan of Grey’s Anatomy so I knew about the ‘Mc’ thing and you fit the description so I was really confused.”

“I’m not hot,” Bucky mumbled. “I’m average.”

“If you’re average, I’m a pauper,” Tony snorted. “Jesus fuck, James, you are… your eyes destroy me and… anyway. This is why I was confused and then I realized that you genuinely have no idea how sexy you are.”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “Can we change the subject?”

“How ‘bout I show you how sexy you are?”

“Well that at least sounds like more fun.”

* * *

“Oh, fuuuuuuuuuck,” Darcy said slowly early in the morning.

“What,” Steve mumbled and blinked himself awake. She was quiet for a few minutes until he sat completely up and saw what was on her phone screen. “Oh, fuck.”

_ROYAL BOY TOY’S EXTRA TIRE_ read the first headline in the Google Alert Darcy had set up for Bucky. The next wasn’t much better, _HOT PRINCE PLAYS CHUBBY BUNNY._

“What the living fuck does that even mean?” Steve went to grab for his own phone and tried to dial Bucky.

“A reference to that frat house game? The one where you stuff the marshmallows?” Darcy said, scrolling frantically and not looking at her boyfriend. “What picture set this off?”

“He’s not answering,” Steve muttered. “Didn’t they have a beach thing yesterday? Something with a yacht?”

“My brother and a yacht are now in the same sentence,” Darcy muttered. “Oh, fuck, here.” She turned her phone to Steve and they both examined the picture.

“See,” Steve said, “I think the real issue is that Bucky is a healthy human person who doesn’t work out for a living and he is surrounded by…”

“Dehydrated men afraid to eat carbs?”

“That explains the six texts I got yesterday asking if Thor was taking on new clients,” Steve sighed.

“He said that Tony makes him feel good about his body,” Darcy said. “I made some joke about how Barnes kids comes with extra padding while Tony was on the phone a few weeks ago and I got a talking down from royalty. Truly a special moment.”

“You know how _I_ feel about _your_ body,” Steve growled and Darcy swatted at him.

“Focus, horndog,” Darcy giggled. “He’s gonna spiral.”

“Well,” Steve said with a pragmatic tone to his voice, “this is when we see what Tony is made of. If he can pull Buck out of a self-shaming spiral, then I’m dusting off my best man speech right now.”

“Fuck you, that you’re best man. I’m his _twin_.”

“Yes, because that’s what we’re focusing on right now.”

Darcy worried her lip and Steve noticed the shift. He put down his phone and pulled her close. “Babe, this has been a thing for him for a long, long time - ever since that press tour - and it’s not going to go away just because he’s with someone Buzzfeed called hot once.”

“They called him ‘hot’ many times, Steven,” Darcy mumbled. “So did Bustle.”

“Isn’t that a piece of clothing?”

Darcy snorted. “Yes, if we were Victorian, now it’s a website.”

“Fine.” He carded his fingers through her hair. “This feeling about how he looks isn’t based in reality, it’s based on one publicist who was terrible at his job anyway.”

“I mean, _of course_, Buck was eating his feelings but he didn’t look any different than his press photos,” Darcy replied. “We all were barely functioning. Dad just… died. Right there in front of us. Just… dropped dead and then he had to go on television for two weeks straight to talk about a book he wrote for Dad to make him happy and we’re just lucky he didn’t…”

“I know, baby, I know,” Steve muttered and kissed the top of her head.

“And that asswipe took advantage of Bucky’s pain and told him that he was _puffy_,” Darcy sneered the word. “I mean, Rumlow was the kind of guy who thought that ‘fat’ was the worst thing you could be, which is a fucking lie anyway, but the way he said it…”

“He fucked Buck up. For sure.”

“Do you think he can handle being in the papers and everything?” Darcy’s voice was small and Steve held her tighter.

“I think that our James can handle anything, but am I worried? A little. Mostly because he’s going to have to be honest with Tony and that’s not his favorite thing. Flirty lines and sarcasm and charm? A true champion,” Steve confirmed.

“So what do we do?”

“Oh, is your twinsense tingling?” Steve teased, and Darcy swatted at him.

“Those headlines -”

“Are lies,” Steve finished, “and he’s going to have to learn how to tune them out because I don’t think Tony’s going anywhere.”

* * *

“Your Highness,” Pepper pinched the bridge of her nose.

“Pepper, it’s the_ Daily Post_ and that British rag. No one takes them seriously.”

“Yes, but -”

“He’s my boyfriend, Pepper, I’m sure I know if he’s fine or not,” Tony waved a hand dismissively as he twisted the wrench more tightly around a lug nut on the filter he was just finishing building.

“So where is he?”

Tony’s head rose slowly. “That’s a loaded question, Pep.”

“He’s in the gym.”

“He hasn’t gone there the -” Realization dawned across Tony’s face and he swore at the paparazzi. “Fuck them, I’ll go find him.”

“You have a meeting in thirty minutes with Caperhan that you can’t move, Your Highness.”

“This will take fifteen,” Tony replied with a wink and took off down the hallway at a brisk pace. Finding Bucky on the treadmill, he strode up to him with purpose and motioned for him to turn off the machine.

“What are you doing here?” Bucky huffed out. “Pepper said you were booked solid until dinner.”

Tony stepped onto the treadmill and pulled Bucky’s body flush with his. “Listen to me very, _very_ carefully, my love. Those papers say horrible things to make money. Their entire business model is to be cruel for profit. You are gorgeous and not a single man there yesterday had the briefest moment of my attention because you were there. I have fallen so far in love with you that I’m terrified and yet exhilarated. Those lies will never go away, those people who are cruel for money will always be there, but this -” he grabbed the back of Bucky’s neck and pulled him in for a kiss.

“That,” he continued when they parted a few moments later, “will also always be true. I’m sorry I can’t make them go away, but I’ll do everything I can to make you feel as safe with me as I feel safe with you.”

Bucky blinked a few times and nodded, pressing his forehead to Tony’s. He took a deep breath and replied. “I can’t look different than this. I’ve tried. I tried so hard for so long that my stomach is still fucked up from it, so I can’t. This is all I can be.”

“And I’ll never ask you to be anything different,” Tony assured him. “Just wait until we get you into the ceremonial uniform that comes with the role of Consort. Something tells me that’ll win everyone over to our side.”

Tony didn’t notice the look of sheer panic that flit across Bucky’s face, but he should have.

He really should have.

* * *

> _Tony,_
> 
> _I know this is cowardly and I’m sorry, but I cannot face you right now._
> 
> _I love you, I’m sure of it. But I can’t be with you. I can’t risk being with you and ruining everything for you. I’ll distract from the very important work that you have to do for your people. I will always treasure these last few weeks and I’m sorry._
> 
> _You will be an incredible King, Tony, and I’ll be cheering you on from Brooklyn._
> 
> _Bucky_

Jarvis looked up from the note in his hands and at Tony. “If I may assume, sir, that there was a mixup in the protocol department and that you never intended this manual to go to Mr. Barnes?”

“Got it in one, J,” Tony smiled sadly and took a long sip of his whiskey. “So, we’ve only joked about marriage and all that was waaaaaay down the line and then less than two weeks after he meets the country, it looks to him like I’m giving him a manual on how to be a royal husband. Can’t blame him for running.”

“Well, I do,” Pepper snapped from her place on the couch. “He could have asked you questions instead of sneaking out on a commercial flight.”

“The combination of the pictures and the manual was too much,” Tony responded. “So he’s gone and now we move on. What’s next, Ms. Potts?”

“Tony-”

“What’s next, Ms. Potts?”

His eyes bore into her and she took a deep breath. “Your Highness has a 10:30 with the Austrian Ambassador.”

“Francois is literally the last person I want to see today, but fine. I’m going to go blow something up before then.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My beta said this was "dramatic, but good dramatic" - I told her that I had to do my best Hallmark movie impression! But I'd be interested to hear if you agree with her, or any of your thoughts about this really. 
> 
> I'm trying to get you the final chapter next week, but I have some offline life events happening that may prevent it and there'd be a one week hiatus. No matter what, it'll be wrapped up soon. Thanks for reading - means the world.


	5. The Happily Ever After

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ... and they all lived happily ever after.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thanks to my precious Juu for not only coming in with some _clutch_ plot suggestions, but also making sure this was properly written and not shapeless fluff. Don't worry - it's still fluff. She just made sure it was grammatically accurate fluff.

“Have you showered?”

Bucky slowly turned his head to stare at his roommate, with an expression on his face that would freeze most humans in their tracks. Steve Rogers, of course, was no ordinary human.

“James. Barnes. Have. You. Showered?”

“Last week, I think,” Bucky replied, turning back to the television and pretending to be _riveted_ by the marathon of _Chopped_ that was parading across the screen.

“Cool,” Steve replied. “Do you remember you teach tomorrow?”

Bucky waved his hand at Steve, dismissing concern. “I do the opening song and dance routine about syllabi tomorrow. I don’t teach until Wednesday. Plenty of time.”

“That is literally only 48 more hours.”

“And I can shower in 1/48th of that, so I think I’m set, Stevie,” Bucky replied evenly. “Anything else?”

“You gonna return any of his texts?”

“I don’t believe my answer has changed on that matter.”

“You’re a fucking coward.”

“Here in the real world, we call my decision to break up with a _crown prince_ pragmatism, but thank you for your judgement.”

Steve made a huffing noise and said something about calling Darcy that Bucky largely ignored. All he knew was that if he stayed on the cable channels that had nothing to do with news, he wouldn’t see Tony’s face.

He wouldn’t see _Prince Anthony’s_ face.

Bucky was fairly sure that leaving a Dear John letter and sneaking off in the middle of the night eliminated his ability to call the man he loved ‘Tony’.

And as for the pain he was feeling? The excruciating shortness of breath he felt whenever he thought of <strike>Tony</strike> Prince Anthony? Surely that would pass. Surely heartbreak wasn’t a chronic condition. Surely.

* * *

“I’m worried about him,” Pepper confessed to Jarvis in a hushed tone as they watched Tony do a meet and greet with a group of school children who had won an essay contest.

“The feeling is shared, Ms. Potts,” Jarvis returned. “I do not believe he has eaten a full meal since Dr. Barnes’ departure.”

“That’s a month ago,” Pepper hissed.

Jarvis was about to respond when the pair caught the King’s personal secretary out of the corners of their eyes. Hank approached with a note, which he handed to Pepper. She thanked him, read the note, and raised an eyebrow at Jarvis.

“His Majesty requests my presence immediately.” She kept her voice even, but both knew what a rare occasion this was. Jarvis nodded his acknowledgement and she made her way to the King’s suite. Upon arrival, she was announced and beckoned into a room she’d been in approximately six times in her decade of employment.

“You wished to speak to me urgently, Your Majesty,” she said as she dropped into a curtsey.

“I do, Ms. Potts, and it is about my son.”

Pepper’s stomach dropped. “Yes, sir. How can I help?”

“His feelings for the American professor have not waned,” King Howard stated.

Pepper shook her head. “No, sir. And I do not believe they will anytime soon. He fell quite hard for Dr. Barnes.”

King Howard sighed and rose from his desk. He gestured to a grouping of chairs by the fireplace and invited Pepper to sit.

“Ms. Potts, may I take you into my confidence?”

Pepper nodded swiftly, nearly pinching herself that a man who had never spoken to her outside of Tony’s presence would make such a choice.

“I do not hate my son.”

“I never thought you did, Your Majesty,” Pepper replied without thinking.

“Oh?” The King looked intrigued.

_In for a penny…_ She shook her head. “No, sir, I believe you believe in him and in his potential for our Kingdom so much that you try your best to focus him. I also believe he can be a horse’s ass and hard to wrangle, but...”

A smile ghosted the King’s face. “You think I have been misguided in my parenting.”

“It is not my place, Your Majesty.”

“I’m making it your place,” the King responded.

Pepper swallowed a few times and decided to be brave. “Your Majesty, your son believes you loathe him and aren’t proud of him, which I believe to be far from the truth. I believe you two are so similar that you can’t function well together, but for the Kingdom to prosper you must. His Highness is desperate for your approval and love, and I believe you are for his, but since you are a rock and he is a hard place, I do not forsee any change to the current state of affairs.”

The room was soon full of rich laughter and Pepper smiled in relief. “Ms. Potts, I see that hiring you was the 2nd best decision I’ve made in my life.” Before she could ask for clarification, he informed her that the first was marrying Queen Maria.

“You are more right than I am usually comfortable admitting - but I feel against a deadline and so decisions must be made. I am a lot of things, Ms. Potts,” the King continued. “I am brash, and focused, and ambitious. I am my father’s son, but my mother’s as well, and I am getting old. I have been ruling this country for 45 years and it is time for a fresh voice and that voice is my son’s, but he cannot do this alone.

“You are, and have always been, invaluable,” he went on. “But I know how heavy the crown is, and Anthony only thinks he does. He must have a _partner_ and I believe Dr. Barnes is that man.”

Pepper remained silent for a moment until the King asked her to respond. She worried her lip and proceeded. “Your Majesty, your son is the best man I know. He is also arrogant and brash and has a self-destructive streak as wide as the ocean because he loves so hard that he doesn’t know how to stop. In my limited acquaintance with Dr. Barnes, he is focused and ambitious, but also grounded. He has reached massive professional success, but remains closest to his childhood best friend and his twin sister. Most importantly, he is kind, and good, and makes Tony laugh. If I had it within my power to make him come back, I would.”

“Do you believe that Tony would be amenable to a reconciliation?”

Pepper snorted and then covered her mouth with her hand at the inelegance of it. Catching a twinkle in the King’s eye, she lowered it and replied. “In the last two months, he has churned out fourteen new prototypes of water filtration systems for various levels of brackishness in water, perfected something called an arc reactor, and learned Ancient Greek. So, yes, I believe so.”

“Excellent, Ms. Potts,” the King smiled. The action was genuine and lit his face; Pepper knew she was looking at a father and not a King. “Leave it with me, then, but please tell Tony I will be in the States next week for a round of meetings with something he hates - make it up and my office will support you.”

She nodded swiftly. “Will that be all, Your Majesty?”

“That will be all, Ms. Potts.”

* * *

Bucky resisted the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose in frustration. They were_ two months_ into the semester - Spring Break was just around the corner - and his Intro to Historical Economics students were still pains in his ass. It was an elective at Brooklyn Arcadia, but counted as general education requirement for both History and Business credits. When you combined that with his mythical status among freshmen, each Spring term the class was full of students who gave zero fucks about the subject matter, but a lot of fucks about flirting with people around them.

_This is a prestigious research institution. We produce world class academics and leaders and only have a 28% acceptance rate and yet I still can’t get them to write critical essays with proper citations._

“No, Kelsey,” Bucky replied to the question with a plastered smile. “A personal YouTube channel is not automatically an appropriate source, unless that person is reporting a first-person account of something that happened to them and then I would allow it. For example, back in September of 2001, Jon Stewart was hosting The Daily Show and his first monologue after the events of 9/11 expressed very real emotions about the state of the world. If you choose the essay prompt about cultural expressions of economic uncertainty, someone’s personal account of their feelings would be fine as long as you don’t assume universality of data.”

“Thank you, Dr. Barnes,” the young woman responded and Bucky smiled in return.

“Any more questions about the essay?”

A voice boomed from the back of the room and Bucky’s stomach plummeted.

“Are first person interviews allowable citations, Dr. Barnes?”

Bucky’s eyes raised to the top row of the lecture theater and he cleared his throat. “Yes, Your Majesty.”

The students all whipped around so fast to see who was speaking that Bucky’s sure a few of them actually got whiplash.

“Excellent, because I am happy to provide my thoughts on why my country becomes so obsessed with supernatural myths whenever my son or I report losses in our treasury,” the King of Ortelesia grinned like Alice’s Cheshire Cat and Bucky wasn’t so sure he wasn’t in a nightmare.

“Class, may I introduce His Majesty King Howard Eustice Stark of Ortelesia,” Bucky croaked out before clearing his throat and answering the question. “Did the sales of _Twilight_ skyrocket when the Prince crashed the yacht several years back?”

The King nodded and rose from his seat. Descending the stairs to where Bucky was perched at the lectern, he continued. “Our people were distressed when the only heir to the throne decided to take a joyride in a yacht they paid for and expressed their distress in several ways. One being an obsession with a set of novels starring characters who could easily kill both myself and my son, which was a little too close to wish fulfillment for my liking.”

The class chuckled and the King turned to address them. “Students, if I may offer one piece of advice as you address the question put forward to you by your esteemed professor - every element of culture is political and everything goes back to money. Follow the money - how it’s generated, invested, stored, controlled, spent - and you’ll find whatever truth you’re looking for.”

“Well,” Bucky addressed his class, “I can’t close out any better. Your essays must be uploaded to Turn It In and emailed to me by midnight on the 12th. I’ll see you on Tuesday.”

All of their phones were still poised on the King and Bucky and the latter rolled his eyes subtly. “Your Majesty, I believe they want selfies.”

“For their tweeter?”

“Potentially, yes,” Bucky hid a smile. During his time in Ortelesia, he’d become quite fond of Howard, Tony’s dad. Bumbling and short-sighted for sure, and absolutely far too hard on his son and well past due for retirement - but Bucky could tell he loved Tony and he tried. Compared to so many parents he encountered, Howard was a champ.

“My apologies, students, but I am on a tight schedule and must speak to your professor,” the King addressed the crowd. He made a motion to one of his aides and told the class that Pollyanne would make sure they all got mementos and then turned to Bucky. “May we speak in your office?”

“It’s about three buildings away, Your Majesty,” Bucky replied. “So if you and your team will follow me, I’ll be happy to lead you there.”

The King nodded and soon Bucky found himself weaving towards his office followed by a bunch of curious students with their phones out, no doubt live streaming this whole thing to Instagram. He’d been getting questions about Tony all semester and had basically avoided answering them - that wasn’t going to be possible now.

When they were settled in his cramped office, the King ordered his bodyguards to make themselves scarce so that he could talk to Bucky privately.

“Your Majesty,” Bucky began and was cut off.

“I’m here as his father, not a sovereign. Please call me Howard.”

_That’s even worse._ Bucky swallowed. “Howard, I’m not sure how I can help.”

“You’re not sure how you can help, James?” Howard raised an eyebrow. “So I’m assuming you’ve seen the speculation regarding Anthony’s sudden weight loss and bags under his eyes so deep that even our best makeup artists can’t really hide them?”

Bucky averted his eyes and Howard continued. “Why did you leave?”

“I wouldn’t be any good as his consort, and we all know it, so I got out before we got too serious.”

“Bullshit,” Howard responded. “That’s utter bullshit for several reasons, may I explain them to you? First, you would be excellent as his consort because you already were and that is what we all know. You are the only one suffering under a delusion that you are unqualified. Second, I do not believe for a second that you two were not serious. I fell in love with my wife within twenty-two minutes of meeting her, as I’m sure you’re aware.”

“The story is fairly legendary,” Bucky confessed.

“James, when you grow up in the world we do, you learn to judge character fairly quickly. We learn who wants things from us and what they want, who needs us to solve a problem, who loves us simply because of the crown. I have been training Anthony to make those split-second decisions since he was a toddler, which is why he was able to trust you so quickly. My son fell in love with a college professor from Brooklyn and the unfortunate side effect is life in the public eye for you. But do not tell me you are not worthy of it.”

Bucky looked Howard in the eye for the first time since this whole waking nightmare began. “Howard, I love your son. I know that with my whole being. Which is why I know that I am not right for him. I read that book, the one he sent over -”

“Please allow me to correct _that_ misunderstanding,” Howard interrupted. “Ms. Potts’ office had updated several lines of protocol and was sending it to myself and Anthony for approval. That book was not meant to be in your room.”

Bucky blinked. “It wasn’t from Tony?”

Howard smiled kindly. “No, James, it wasn’t. We update the Consort protocols whenever there is a new diplomatic relationship, or cultural event we feel would fall under the purview of the Consort. In this case, the updates regarded Anthony’s recent business at the U.N. as well as some added responsibility within the educational ministry of Ortelesia. Were those changes made with you in mind? I will confess they were. Was the book meant for your eyes? Not at least for another year.”

“Another _year_?”

“Yes, James, at least,” Howard’s smile remained kind and Bucky was finding it harder and harder to breathe. “You see, our law dictates that a spouse does not become Consort until the royal has ascended the throne. Thus, if this had all followed the natural course of events, you would have married Anthony, not the Crown Prince. That is a separate ceremony that is far more about public assurances than anything. Then, when I abdicate to Anthony, which I anticipate doing within the next three years, you would step into the role of Prince Consort to His Majesty King Anthony. Does that make more sense?”

“So we would be married humans first and then we can figure out the royal stuff?” Bucky nearly whispered, not trusting his voice to be any louder.

“Yes, James, married humans first. You have time to learn the family business.” Howard twisted his cufflinks and checked his watch. “James, allow me to be blunt. Since my wife’s sudden death, I have begun putting my affairs in order. I am confident that Anthony will make a good sovereign, but he needs someone who loves him to be his champion. I had that in Maria and I believe that Anthony has that in you.”

“Sir,” Bucky replied, his voice weak from the weight of the last ten minutes.

He was interrupted with a loud bang and looked up to find his sister standing in the doorway of his office. “Okay, Buckaroo, I’ve held my tongue long enough -”

“Darcy -”

“Not now, I just saw your Tony on the news and he looks miserable, Bucky, like, even Buzzfeed is saying your breakup is breaking him and while that syntax is pathetic, it looks true. The man I met in your living room that first morning, God, he loves you and you love him and I don’t know what your damage is but even more importantly you have ruined my chance to be the Ortelesian Pippa. I have been doing squats, James. _Squats_. So, call Tony, grovel as you have to, and go get your boy.”

Darcy froze as the sound of slow clapping filled Bucky’s office. She turned slowly on her heel and immediately dropped into a curtsey.

“Your Majesty, I’m so-”

“Mrs. Matthews is quite an admirable role model, Ms. Barnes,” Howard replied. “But I believe you will quickly surpass her.” He addressed Bucky. “Listen to your sister. The jet is at your disposal.”

* * *

“I have a coffee for Tony?”

Tony nearly dropped the wrench he was holding and turned slowly. _It can’t be._

“Am I dreaming?”

Bucky smiled tentatively and took a few steps into Tony’s workshop. “No.”

Tony felt frozen on the spot. “You left.”

“Yes, I was an idiot.”

“But you’re back.”

“Correct,” Bucky said gently, putting the coffee down on the workbench and stepping into Tony’s personal space.

“Why?” _Why can’t I form longer sentences?_

“Why did I leave or why am I back?”

“Yes.”

Bucky chuckled. “I left because I was scared. I’m back because someone called me on my shit.”

“Who?”

“Your father.”

Tony’s knees gave out slightly from shock and Bucky caught him. “I can explain.”

“Please.”

And so, after he led Tony over to a couch in the corner of the workshop, Bucky did just that. He explained why the photos were so hard (_I had this publicist, on the first tour when I was pretty fucking vulnerable, and he really fucked up my brain and how I see myself and I’ve done therapy, but his voice is still there saying I’ll never be enough and those headlines were just too much and I read them in his voice_) and why he ran without saying goodbye. He talked at length about his insecurities around his own brain (_You may not know this, but a lot of the academy is designed to keep people in their place and not trusting their own brains. It’s a really toxic environment and I woulda left ages ago if I didn’t love teaching_) and finished with the story of Howard crashing his class. As he talked, Tony began to breathe again and found his words as he asked clarifying questions.

“Howard actually referenced _Twilight_?” Tony started giggling.

“He had those students eating out of the palm of his hand,” Bucky smiled. “I could see where you learned your charm.”

Tony rolled his eyes, but cautiously reached for Bucky’s hand. “So, what does this all mean. For you and me?”

“Well,” Bucky took a deep breath. “I have a job that keeps me in Brooklyn until at least the middle of May next year because I signed a contract and I’m not that guy. You have a Kingdom to learn to run if he’s serious about the timeline. So those are the complications, but the truth is that I’m so fucking in love with you I’m in pain. And I’m still wary of this Consort gig, but I’m not at all wary of the husband one, so talk to your privy council or whoever and let’s get this show on the road.”

Tony blinked. “Was that a proposal?”

“Pepper explained that you actually legally have to ask, so it’s me saying I’ll say yes whenever you do,” Bucky replied and cupped his hand around Tony’s jaw. “The last two months have been some of the worst of my life - up there with right after Dad died - and I’m not doing it again. I am underprepared for this life, but I’m willing to be yours and I figure we can sort out how I can be Ortelesia’s along the way.”

“You know, Mr. Barnes, I believe we can,” Tony murmured as he drew Bucky in for a kiss. “I do believe we can.”

* * *

**Epilogue: First Christmas after Howard Abdicates**

“I swear to all the saints and some of the sinners that if you don’t put your shoes on right now, Adelaide, you are not getting any of your presents,” Bucky stared down his three-year-old daughter, who stared him down right back.

“Adi,” Tony called from the other side of the room, where he was changing their infant son, Pierre, “listen to Papa.”

“I don’t like shoes,” the girl replied.

“Well, I don’t like attitude, so we’re all losers today,” Bucky replied. “Shoes. Now. Or you won’t match Aunt Darcy and Mama and we can’t let you in the picture.”

Adi’s eyes went wide - withholding access to her favorite people was a threat beyond words - and dutifully put her shoes on.

“Lying to her so young, Barnes,” Tony murmured.

“Parenting is low-grade manipulation and don’t let anyone tell you different, Your Majesty,” Bucky smirked and kissed his husband.

While Bucky and Tony had gotten married only six months after their reunion, it had taken another three full years before Howard had felt ready to abdicate and Tony to ascend. Their bickering had not stopped - if anything, it had gotten more heated - but they’d reached an understanding that both were doing the best for the Kingdom and, as a result, their relationship was stronger than it had ever been.

Bucky spent a year teaching classes largely online - it was amazing what a large grant to the IT department at Brooklyn Arcadia accomplished - and then resigned to help Tony get ready for the eventual coronation and to write again and to take the lead in raising the children they were anxious to have.

A year into their marriage, Bucky and Tony had approached Pepper to see if her offer of surrogacy was legitimate and were delighted to find out that it was. Adelaide Evangeline Stark was born soon after and was followed shortly by Pierre-Edouard Buchanan Stark.

The family was busy getting ready for the annual Royal Christmas Gala, where the palace doors were open all day for the people of Ortelesia to come and get hot chocolate and cookies and get pictures taken with the Royal Family and/or Santa. Adi and Pierre only made an appearance for a brief while and no pictures were taken _with_ them. This boundary was controversial, but not one their fathers were budging on.

Finally, Adi’s hair was fixed, her shoes were on, and Pierre was as clean as he was going to get. The quartet made their way to the room where the official portraits were being taken. Adi was well behaved until she saw her godmother.

“Aunt Darcy!” The girl was off and running to greet Bucky’s sister, who was getting a title of her own that year. Darcy Evangeline Rogers was to become the Duchess of Longcrea alongside her husband, Steven Grant Rogers, who would be the Duke of Longcrea.

_“Where the hell is Longcrea?” Darcy had asked when Bucky had told her._

_“It’s a beach town that the crown owns and maintains as a public park.”_

_“I’m Duchess of a park?”_

_“Do you want to be the duchess of a dumpster, because I’m sure I can arrange that.”_

_“A beach park sounds lovely, James, thank you.”_

“Hi, Button,” Darcy reached down to pick up her niece. “Cool shoes.”

“They match yours and Mama’s,” Adi whispered conspiratorially.

“Yes,” Darcy stifled a smile and made eyes with Pepper across the room. “I know. It’s because we’re the three ladies of the family and we have to stick together.”

“And Mama loves shoes!”

“Mama does love shoes,” Tony affirmed, as he hugged his in-laws and signaled to the photographer that they were ready to be posed. After only a small amount of tears (Pierre) and screams of frustration (Tony), the official royal portrait was taken and the family were ready to greet their guests.

Bucky knelt down in front of Adi and looked his daughter in the eye. “What are the rules?”

“I only smile and say ‘thank you’, I don’t yell at anyone who says mean things or makes fun of you or Daddy or Mama or Aunt Darcy or Uncle Steve.”

“Or?”

“Or Grandpa Howard,” the girl finished.

“Correct. And what should you always remember?”

“That I am your daughter first and you and Daddy love me more than you love the job I’ll have someday.”

“That’s right, Button,” Bucky blinked away a quick tear that gathered in the corner of his eye. He wasn’t a religious man, but from the minute Pepper was pregnant, he had been praying for this child to any deity that would listen. He prayed she would know how much she was loved by her family, that she would be empathetic, just, and wise, and that she would know joy. He and Tony fretted how to do better by her than Howard had done by Tony - when to start her training, how to help her learn, how to make sure she and Pierre grew up with a special bond and not a rivalry.

“Your Highness,” Rhodey tapped Bucky on the shoulder, “they’re ready for the announcement.”

“Thanks, Rhodey,” Bucky smiled up at Tony’s personal chief bodyguard as he rose from his kneeling position - feeling every single one of his 38 years in those knees. _Time to listen to Pepper and get a trainer. Ugh._ “Button, why don’t you go see Mama and have her make sure your hair is perfect again.”

“Ready, Doctor Barnes?” Tony whispered from behind as he wrapped his arms around Bucky’s waist and rested his chin on Bucky’s shoulder. Bucky smiled slightly, knowing this meant Tony had put on the shoes with the lifts in them. The public didn’t know Tony’s exact height, and Pepper’s office felt it was essential that Tony appear taller than Bucky, when they were, in reality, the exact same height. While Bucky had been presented to all of Ortelesia months earlier as their Royal Prince Consort during his coronation, this would be the first time the whole family would be presented with all their official titles.

“Ready, Coffee Thief,” Bucky responded and leaned back slightly into his husband.

“Wanna bet how long it takes Darcy to make a face that Pep has to explain tomorrow?”

“Three minutes,” Bucky responded as he extracted himself and went to retrieve Pierre from Pepper.

“Oh ye of little faith,” Tony chuckled. “I’ll take eight.”

“Wager?”

“If you win, I’ll get us that terrible superhero movie you want to see, and if you win, I’ll take the meeting with the Bratislavian embassy you’ve been bugging me about,” Tony replied before he called for Adi to come take his hand for their walk onto the dais raised above the courtyard.

“That is not an even bet,” Bucky muttered and then winced as someone opened the door. “Holy balls, it’s cold.”

“It’s December 23rd, James,” Pepper said dryly from behind him.

“It’s still cold as a -” he stopped himself as he caught his daughter’s wide eyes. “It’s very cold.”

Tony stifled a giggle as the herald began the announcement.

“Citizens and subjects, honored guests, may I present to you the Ortelesian Royal Family. His Majesty, King Anthony, His Royal Highness Prince James, Consort to the Crown and husband of the King, Her Royal Highness Crown Princess Adelaide, and His Royal Highness Prince Pierre-Edouard.”

The quartet stepped out onto the balcony to the cheers of the crowd. They waved and waved and finally it was time for everyone else to join them.

“Citizens and subjects, honored guests, may I present to you the newly proclaimed Duke and Duchess of Longcrea, Lord Steven Grant Rogers and Lady Darcy Adelaide Rogers, accompanied by Dowager King Howard.”

Darcy stepped onto the balcony and took Bucky’s hand. He squeezed it and turned towards her, touching their noses together the way they had for their whole lives.

“Hey Buckaroo,” she whispered, barely audible above the roar of the crowd.

“Yeah, Darce?”

“How does it feel to live happily ever after?”

Bucky turned to catch a grin on his husband’s face as their daughter peered into the crowd and waved enthusiastically to her favorite pre-school teacher. Pierre was content in his arms and he could see Pepper, Rhodey, and Howard just over Tony’s shoulder. He turned back to her and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Pretty fucking fantastic.”

She laughed and turned her attention back to the crowd. For the record, both Bucky and Tony were wrong. Darcy didn’t make any faces that the cameras caught. Instead, the nose bump between the Barnes twins was the photo of the day.

And so, once upon a time, in a kingdom most of the world learned about when their Crown Prince married an American University professor, there lived a family whose bonds were both of blood and heart, choice and fate. King Anthony was a just, if slightly erratic, ruler who was largely adored by his people and frustrating to foreign powers. His husband was known throughout the world for his ability to weave truth through stories, publishing countless books and delivering lectures on complex theories he made seem so accessible. They raised their daughter to be brave and their son to be kind but most of all, they all lived happily ever after.

* * *

Achievements earned as part of the Holiday Movie Challenge 2019. Click [here](https://heamarvel.tumblr.com/holiday) for more info!

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have enjoyed every single second of this journey and I hope you have, too! This was my first dedicated WinterIron story, but it will not be my last. 
> 
> Thanks to kocuria for the incredible banner that displays the badges I earned with this fic during the MHEA Holiday Movie Challenge 2019. 
> 
> Find me on [Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/betheflame1) or [Tumblr](http://betheflame.tumblr.com) for more on these yahoos. You can also submit prompts and cajole me into writing faster - it usually works. If you're on Discord, I'm definitely there, too, and probably hanging in the [Stony](https://discord.gg/z5WSqbS) or [Stuckony](https://discord.gg/jtXcc3n) servers.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [collab: betheflame](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23362237) by [kocuria-visuals (kocuria)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kocuria/pseuds/kocuria-visuals)


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